eyelash growth

You would think we were beyond this. you would think the progress of women would have made this unnecessary. you would think a tutorial on how to speak about professional women would have become obsolete decades ago.

Carl P. Paladino proved that wrong. with two words, he took us back half a century.

When Paladino called Sen. Kirsten E. Gillibrand the “little girl” of Sen. Charles E. Schumer, he did not just deride a sitting U. S. senator. he insulted all of us who strive to push forward in careers in heels and skirts.

It was a flip comment made on the campaign trail in an election season from which we’re all still trying to recover.

Paladino the candidate has said he will not run again. but Paladino the businessman is still with us, and so are all the old-school types who think it’s acceptable to voice this subtle brand of sexism.

So, for their benefit, here’s a bit of a primer. You’ve heard it before, but perhaps you need a reminder. they are simple rules, really. Not that hard to remember.

First, and most important, we are not “honey,” “sweetie,” “babe,” “doll,” “little girl” or any other word you stick in a sentence to cut us down.

You might have thought it was OK, because we did not flinch, bat a mascara-covered eyelash or act offended. That’s because we’ve learned over the years the best way to deal with such comments is not to react at all.

Utter such words, and you simply reveal you’re outdated. You’re stuck in an era the rest of us have long ago left behind. It is not hip to fall back on being anti-politically correct. It is not about your belief that we’ve all become too sensitive. It’s about respect.

Second, if there is no equivalent insult for a man, you should not use it to describe a woman. Even when muttered under your breath.

Schumer showed us this is still too common when he called a flight attendant a “bitch” last year when she asked him to turn off his cell phone before takeoff. he later called the woman to apologize, but the utterance had already reverberated across the country.

The thing about that particular derogatory remark is that it comes bundled with a whole lot of stereotypes about the way women should or should not behave. a passive woman rarely is labeled with that choice word.

Which gets us to rule no. 3 in this “Simple Guide to Living in the 21st Century.”

A woman can be powerful and attractive and have reached the upper echelon on her own political savvy. there is more than meets the eye. Men seem to have forgotten this when it comes to New York’s junior senator.

Take a comment attributed to Sen. Harry Reid in September by the Washington Web site Politico. Reid, the site reported, referred to Gillibrand as “the hottest member” of the Senate before praising her knowledge of securities law during a September fundraiser in New York City. Even Gov. David a. Paterson was asked to weigh in on Gillibrand’s looks after she appeared in a photo spread in “Vogue” last month.

Gillibrand may be blond and blue-eyed. She may have made an inside-the- Beltway list of “50 Most Beautiful People.” but she’s also a Dartmouth grad, a lawyer, a mother of two and a senator.

You do not get to that level without being able to take the political knocks. you do not get there on looks alone. you do not get there by being somebody’s “little girl.”

If you feel the need to make such comments, be prepared to be labeled an antique, an anachronism from a bygone era. Strong, poised and powerful women will leave you in the dust.

Our culture may soak up the male chauvinistic world of “Mad Men.”We love to watch it because we no longer live it.

djgee@buffnews.comnull

Simple rules of respect to women